Valerie Gommon Midwife’s Blog

Archive for the ‘Motherhood’ Category

A recent survey by parenting website Netmums shows that new parents are being given outdated, contradictory and even dangerous parenting advice from family, friends and even strangers!

The survey found that parents are being “advice” about feeding and parenting which may be out-dated or even dangerous.  Parents are encouraged to take this advice “with a pinch of salt”, and to listen but not necessarily act on the advice, and if in doubt to discuss with their midwife or health visitor.

Much of the family advice was found to be contradictory, with over half (51%) of mums having been told to wake a baby regularly to establish a routine, while 44% have also been told never to wake a sleeping baby!  There are many proponents of the “right” way to parent; but I would urge you to listen to your baby and listen to your heart or gut instinct and do what you feel is right for you.  However well meant, the advice given can be undermining and actually makes mums feel that their parenting skills are being criticised, with 40%feeling put down all of the time.  

You are your baby’s parent – you know your baby best – be confident and follow your instincts!

Guest blog written by Naomi Edwards

Over the last few days I have been thinking about the saying Yummy Mummy and if there is really such a thing in the real world. There is also the impression that Yummy Mummies are rich or famous, spend their time lunching and shopping. There was also a recent article about women being educated on weight management throughout and after pregnancy

I truly believe in the first 1-3 months of pregnancy the term Yummy Mummy err…..probably not, I became best of friends with my toilet (very close) and my bed was my confidant and the television became my entertainment and my clock( as I only knew what time is was due to daytime scheduled programming). So slummy YES, yummy NO. I probably didn’t even brush my teeth for that whole time because brushing my teeth made me want to be sick. In fact every time I did brush my teeth without fail I was hugging my best friend the toilet.

Once I got to about 6 month pregnant I found that my skin became radiant and my hair started to grow, my partner started paying me and my neat like bump more attention, in fact everyone started paying more attention towards to me. I have always had a love for clothes and this didn’t really change throughout pregnancy. The first chance I got to get up and out and dress up my bump I did it and I loved it.  I’m no Victoria Beckham but just because I was pregnant I didn’t stop being me. BUT THEN……..

My daughter came, right at the end of December and I remember firework going off while I was lying in my hospital bed and thinking,” What the hell is that… hmm I wonder what’s going on”. Then it dawn on me it was New Year’s Eve and from that point on nothing was important anymore just my little girl, oh and my other half Hehehe!!!  From this point on certainly, NO Yummy Mummy.

I receive a 4th degree tear in labour, and I found it very difficult to breastfeed. I had not long moved to an area (Milton Keynes) where I had no family or friends and I ended up in a very low place in the first 9 months after having my daughter. So the feeling of happiness and contentment I had through the last 6 months of pregnancy went right out the window.

I put my weight on after birth also which was very difficult to deal with, but I reckon that was definitely down to the daily lethal combination of snickers and sprite.  I spent all my days indoors in my partner jogging bottoms.  After being in a very low place for about a year  I decided that I had to start taking control and I needed to feel like me again.(After a long tearful long distance chat with my mum). How did I do this?  I did this through clothes I realised I needed to find me again. I learnt how to dress my new body shape and through clothes my confidence returned slowly but surely.  I started with very small step like just wearing lip gloss, new earrings and doing my hair even if I wasn’t going to leave the house that day.

There is so much pressure nowadays for women to snap back into shape after birth but let’s face it, it is almost impossible to do this. When would we find the time to be down the gym everyday unless you had one built into your home and you did it at naptime, but if you were slogging it out in the gym who the hell would do the laundry or cook dinner.

I feel it is very important that mothers don’t forget about themselves, but it something which shouldn’t be rush into, we are all not Victoria Beckham or Myleene Klass but I do think we should take some sort of inspiration from them in that, you don’t have to forget about yourself and how you look just because you are a mother.

I wanted to share my experience with other women and out of that came Match U Style Consultancy, I run workshop for mothers so they can understand their body shapes and get to grips with what type of clothes are right for them and work with the lifestyle. I also do individual consultations which involve a style analysis, wardrobe weeding and personal shopping sessions.

I believe with all my heart that if you look good, you feel good even if it’s just that initial moment when you look in the mirror before leaving to go to work, to the supermarket or out for dinner. If you look good on the outside you feel good on the inside.

Naomi Edwards is a Style Consultant for new mum and women with children. She has also launched a personal gift shopping service and a small online gift shop. She will also be launching an Awareness site for women to talk about taboo issues around Pregnancy, Birth and Motherhood early next year.

To find out more about her visit her website at